Jokes about dating and being single

01-Oct-2019 11:44

- Sharon Stone I discovered that I scream the same way, whether I'm about to be devoured by a great white, or if a piece of seaweed touches my foot. Carmen Boyle, Olympic luge gold medal winner There are only two reasons to sit in the back row of an airplane.- Axl Rose Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house. Either you have diarrhea, or you're anxious to meet people who do.A: Because they still haven't invented a vibrator that can do the dishes, cut the lawn, paint the house Q: What's the most common sleeping position of a man?A: Around Q: What's the difference between a man and a condom?- Henry Kissinger I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with "Guess" on it. " -Arnold Schwarzenegger Honesty is the key to a relationship. - Courteney Cox, as Monica on "Friends" Hockey is a sport for white men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is.

There are some universal qualities that no guy wants in a girlfriend, so if your goal is to be single, here is your to-do list. You stay late every night of the week, especially on your anniversary, and he’d better not complain about it. Want to chat about relationships, Stephen King or your favorite true crime podcast/documentary/book?

A: Condoms have changed - they're no longer thick and insensitive Q: Why are men like coffee?

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